Monday, December 2, 2013

Daddy!

Suddenly dad came to my mind this Sunday.

Counting the Blessings:
  • Dad was very punctual. Always on dot, that even neighbours would comment about what an early riser he was. He would not drink bed coffee, he would take bath in cold water. Not once have i seen my dad take bath in hot water. 
  • He was very devout and he had a silver shiva linga and prayer set. Early morning after taking bath, he would offer god milk, do pooja and only then have his breakfast. He would go for sabarimala so many times with proper anna dhana. He gave a lot for temples.
  • He encouraged, never forced, praying to God, fasting, abstaining from non-veg, eating together at proper timings together as a family.
  • He would repeatedly talk about having unity of thoughts, words and deeds. Having a clear conscience. Not keeping anything in mind. As I grew out of childhood, I could never lie to dad, never had to in fact.
  • While we would beg mom to sprinkle water on us to wake us up. Dad would never wake us up. In his presence, even though he never made any disturbing sound, I would just wake up on my own.
  • Was my dad's apple of the eye. I was given boiled apples as a child; all my life the best quality fruits, vegetables, the best food, costly clothes and abundant love.
  • He knew the best tailors for my bulbul dress, and chudi suits and drive for more than 1.5 hours for the perfect stitch.
  • Dad designed his own house, gates, closets, furnitures. He designed his own greeting cards for his clients and wished them for their birthdays. He maintained good relations with all his clients.
  • He encouraged creativity. From childhood, remember having oil paint, all colours. He got us all story books, magazines, champak, Gokulam, Readers Digest, Twinkles etc. He even got a casino keyboard. He would take me to all painting competitions, essay competitions and wait till i finished them and escort me. He would escort us to school, carry our lunch hot during noon, pick us back. Of course, in college, he didn't get me Arabian Nights from bhel library after i finished the first volume and i had to borrow the remaining 5 volumes from another uncle in the library.
  • He would make me write and would take a scale and correct font sizes and alignment and spacing for my handwriting.
  • He got a Remington typewriter and made me practice keying, thanks to him, and his exercises of keying in question papers for my brother's board exams, his client letters, i can type very fast within minutes. 
  • During summer holidays, he would make us translate hindi to english and vice versa, even Indian express editorials.
  • Remember playing frisbee games with dad as a child. He would make us run in a competition with the neighbouring girls.
  • Remember serving food for dad. He would eat very beautifully and neatly. He would mix curd rice neatly and we would feed from his hand in the end. Dad liked it very clean and neat. With mom, we could eat with cooking vessels next to our plates, with dad, serving vessel had to be properly set.
  • Dad believed in food is medicine and medicine is food. His always ate food at regular times. I don't remember even one day, when he ate his breakfast without bathing. He would like curry leaves chutney over coconut chutney. He never made fuss about food, enjoyed it when it was good, didn't complain when it was bad. He liked lemon tea.
  • He would set up time table of food to be prepared each day, since he was also managing the canteen. We had eggs with pepper early morning. He made me prepare sambar till i got it perfect. He would get the expert to cook a new dish like hotel at home few times. He would teach me to make the perfect sambar, tasty kurma, cauliflower fry during holidays.
  • Even in 10th standard board exams, he would make us help mom in kitchen by cutting vegetables, before we started our studies. When my mom was sick, he would prepare a timetable of when to serve juice, food for mom.
  • It used to be an elaborate tea - party with snacks served on tray in the evenings, when mom came from office. Even if there was no milk or sugar, dad would make us drink sukku malli kaapi with jaggery with gusto, which the guests also enjoyed.
  • He loved fried moong dal and boiled peanuts. Can't ever eat fried moong dal without thinking about him
  • He was a vegetarian in his later years. Whenever, i would go home, he would serve keerai on vaazhai ellai. 
  • He would treat his friends elaborate meals at home or outside and delight them with some specialty dish.
  • He would feed me the best food, buy lots of fruits. He would peel mosambis, and pomegrenates every afternoon and evening and put glucose on top of it and make me eat.
  • More than mom, it was dad, who comforted me, when i fell down and hurt my knees. Mom was strong and would not show it, dad would get emotional when i was hurt.
  • With a budget of 5k for Diwali, he would spend 50% on my clothes. He was lavish when it came to spending on me. 
  • He encouraged all my interests. When i asked for 500 for astrology, he would give it without another question. He never put a stop for my interest in astrology, unlike my mom, brother and sister, who never liked me studying astrology. Whether it was numerology books and consultation, a costly interior decoration book or maps book from RD, he would unflinchingly pay all my bills.
  • Had lost a year after joining REC Jalandhar and had written the local BDU entrance exam after 9 months of hospitalization. He did not want me to waste another year and paid 1L much beyond his strength and got me admitted in engineering college, arranging car for each trip.
  • He provided me the best medical care known to him, irrespective of how it emptied his pockets.
  • He got the best books - colourful chemistry foreign edition book with amazing reaction colours, that made me love inorganic chemistry
  • For my 10th standard, he printed previous year question papers and wrote math questions in his hand and made me write exams every sunday. Even when he was in a hurry to go to office, he took out some time, to test what i have been studying since morning by asking questions or asking to relate the whole lesson, expressing such keen interest and being fully present.
  • Dad would time everything, the time i took for making up my sister's hair, getting ready for school.
  • If i forgot a pen for assignment, he would travel all the way from home to college to give me the pen for assignments.
  • He would never question, on why i was late. If i boarded a new bus and came late, he would not question why. During inter-college or school competitions, even if i came home at 2:30, he would not question me and let me in. He would fund all esoteric things like numerology, astrology. 
  • He introduced me to Thirumoolar and his writings. He introduced me to sukku milagu thipli. After ilizarov surgery, i stated that am not to going eat, till i can shit on my own, without anyone's support. He preached at length thirumoolar and importance of elimination and got our Indian loo replaced with western loo within a day.
  • When i put vaseline and creams, for my vata skin, he would talk about simple coconut oil. Now, after years, i have come back to oil, malai and nuts, rather than these petroleum jelly based creams.
  • When i bought Baba Ramdev's relatively costly medicines, dad would say, that whatever medicine you need, would be available at your doorstep. And looking back now, it is indeed true, vata narayanan leaves, pirandai, kovai, aloe vera, kuppai meni, keelanezhi, you name the herb, i truly need, everything is indeed growing wildly all around where i stay. I don't have to spend 100s or 1000s on some packaged medicine.
  • Dad was particular about poojas and pariharas. Once he made me travel all the way to kodumudi for a marriage sort of function with a kalasam.
  • Even when he was away, he ensured, i was properly taken care of.
  • He would help with all assignments and projects, kaleidoscopes. He would help me practice and rehearse bharatnatyam where i was the snake kalinga, he would drum the tea poy as me and my sister sang in unison. He encouraged singing, and our neighbours would say, drumming and singing was a sweet orchestra. Even in the bikes, he would make us sing on the way. He was a great fan of fine arts, music and dance and had learnt guitar. He loved traditional music a lot.
  • For my school, even as he was getting ready, he would express keen interest to listen to what the hindi or english chapter was all about. Early morning, he would check, if what i read was correct and ask me questions. he would dictate at great speed to check our spellings. He would ask us to enact our own ads in the evenings.
  • He would make us (cousins included) do exercise on the terrace early morning before sunrise. 
  • He would take us for morning and evening walks and was particular about maintaining good health. He made sure the tv was never disturbing our studies.
  • For my sister who used to go for pravachans, wrote sanskrit exams and became a vaishnavite and a vegetarian from childhood, he would make her recite omkaras and mantras early morning in gyan mudra, while it was exercise and books for me.
  • Dad was a great fan of brahmin culture and would relate stories of his brahmin friends, the food habits and always made sure, it was reflected in our cooking and cleanliness. He would describe how maamis served him food or beverages and that would become the rule going forward at home. 
  • I would hurriedly clean up when i would hear his bike sound, he would come home and take the broom and clean up the dust under the cupboard. He would clean and wash even vessels to perfection.
  • Dad was very particular about housekeeping, neatness, cleanliness and punctuality.
  • He would take us for LTC tours every year, to a different part of the country.
  • He gave our anna nagar home for a school for many years at the lowest possible rent.
  • Whenever i travelled with him, dad would make sure, i was very comfortable. He would arrange a car for me everytime. He would wait for me, early morning around 5 am as Mayiladuthurai express would come.
  • He had one huge master bed, but he would sleep down and let me sleep alone on the bed. Even in our unconfirmed berths, he would sleep down on newspapers, while letting me sleep properly on the berth from Delhi.
  • When i had my first breakup in b-school, he took off to stay with me in hostel, took me to temples and soothed me. He never forced me for marriage. He was over protective. At college, he locked the phone, so that i don't answer calls from my engineering friends. 
  • Dad was a master salesman, he would convince anyone that his idea was actually theirs and make them buy LIC policies from my school teachers to colleagues. He had a huge client base and winning sales pitch. Dad had a sweet way of convincing people.
  • He had a subtle sense of humour and like to speak on stage voluntarily and share his experience in meetings and crowds.
  • As dad got ready and wore his formal shirt, we would go behind and adjust the shirt. 
  • Dad would make neighbouring akka ask me if i loved any guy, stating, that he had reserved his bhel shares for my wedding and asked if i wanted gold. I told him, no, i don't want anything to be locked, other than what i can wear and roam freely all around without fear.
  • Dad would buy me pink dress and cakes for my birthdays for many years till i grew out of pink
  • For his 6-2 shift, he was always on dot, that my neighbours would relate even after years.
  • Dad was the only reason, i joined IIMB and not FMS. If not for dad, I would have chosen the cheaper option for doing MBA. He never asked for a single penny from my salary in cognizant days.
  • Dad was my company, whenever i walked alone in Bangalore. I would keep talking and walking for hours with dad. He would take time off for enrolling in colleges, paying fees, registration etc.
  • Dad was the reason, i took engineering. He would say, that by mistake he chose BCom over BE without knowing the significance and so i chose BE over Fine Arts for him.
  • Dad would wear all the dresses i got for him without complaining. He would set up high standards, belts had to be park avenue, shirts from raymonds, he had high standards on quality and pomp.
  • He took the best care of my grandmother till his death. He funded the education of all his younger sister's kids, kept them at home, enrolling them to the best schools. He married off all his younger sisters and provided for them.
  • Dad never thought small, he wanted it big in life, be it anything. Dad was my mother and mom was my father in some aspects. Dad had high standards in life. 
  • He was never comfortable with window shopping. He valued others times. While i would go to coffee shop and sit talk, not buying anything, dad would not let me spend time thus.
  • Dad was very caring about where i travelled at what time i travelled. While my mom readily agreed on my tours, dad would give me lectures to stay in one place.
Earlier i used to miss dad a lot, now, i know, he is there always looking after me. God bless you where ever you are. God keep you safe, healthy, prosperous and happy.

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