I was supposed to have met him the day after one dwadashi, but later, when I realized i had to travel on dwadashi, I cancelled the tickets and decided that, I will go only for final frame removal to see him. This time, I waited till my entrance exams got over and the stupid certification got over. Amidst my exam tensions, my PM was saying, my leave might be cancelled, if I didn’t complete the KT to V. We stayed till 10 pm, to complete the KT, the last few days and my train was at 11:55 and I started from office at 11:30…. As usual, UHC said, it is not going to approve my pre authorization, since ilizarov frame removal was a cosmetic surgery according to them…and as usual, my HR mgr got it approved on the last day….
At 11:50, in cantonment, it was pretty amusing,… there was a thayir sadham who was literally angry with me for traveling alone at night… did I know that the coach will stop at this place? and similar questions…this is the second time I got unsolicited help with this checked yellow dress… and finally when the train came at 12:30… the coach door was swinging and I didn’t have a solid support…so that thayir sadham got hold of my arm in a painful grip and I boarded my coach… I had arranged the teddy, the airpillows and tried to doze when again after almost 25 minutes, he came back asking, if I was ok… 4-5 oks…well…whatever…he said, he will drop me at home in Chennai… no thanks I said, I was getting down at katpadi and lied that my dad would be coming to pick me up… I always wished there was someone to say tata when I left and pick me up when I came… but always…I had to travel alone…with my throat hurting at the stations…oft is a prohibited area with buses once an hour…even if anyone wanted to send me off… they would not get return buses until 3 hrs later at 1 am…so better to go alone…
Next day dec 19 around 4 am…it was pouring like anything…as I alighted from the train, I had got completely drenched…I went up and down the slanting railway over head bride and there was a bus waiting and I boarded the bus and reached the C… my appt was around 8 and I waited, wondering what to do in this rain…. no auto seemed to coming anywhere near the gate where I was standing… at last…I decided…I will stand in that pool of water and wave my hands for any auto that stops… after 5 minutes of getting soaked…one auto took me to stinking solai lodge…where I took bath… carefully anne frenched leaving the area around the pins… at 7, I didn’t have any umbrella…I got under a Chinese/north east guy’s umbrella…till C gate and then I waited…I was summoned as the second patient… I had taken my x rays with the previous cancelled appt slip and he just had to arrange the surgery timings…
IJ said, I should have given him some warning… he had seen my yesterday night’s CiaoTomorrow mail only that morning… I told him…he had filled in the preauth form for surgery on 20…so he should have known… the xrays were not visible initially…so I went out and he summoned me again after 5-10 minutes and he said…okie the frame could be removed…great I thought…though I was scared that the fibula still had the 2 cm gap… he said, he needed someone with me the next day…I told him, since you said, this is a minor procedure…I didn’t want to trouble my parents during rains…
He had asked how was my job and all those questions and said, had it been a poor guy, he would have removed the pins in 10 minutes without anesthesia, but that was not the case with me… and he went on to say that c was behind money and its mission was to treat gently… in America, treatment costs would run to crores and the docs would spend 80% of the time talking to the insurance ppl, to clarify rates etc… but if ij were to do that…his job would be boring…interacting with patients and counseling was the job he liked…he said…with an intense look…I was embarrassed since I had a pimple under my nose…that refused to disappear in spite of my frantic efforts…
Since, it was a daycare stuff, I had to go to anesthesia to get the clearance… this wonderful lazy doc guy… asked the usual questions and popped in one more extra question, whether I used contraceptives…”excuse me”, I exclaimed… he said, if I had been using them…then anesthesia would increase bleeding…I replied no with a grimace and went back to the ward, thinking, if mom or dad had been there with me…this guy would not have asked me this q…
After usual room booking jhanjats…I got into 04E… this time, I went to the single pvt ac room …and somehow, I didn’t feel good there and came back to O4E… dad was going to come on the day of surgery…that night another lady anesthetist came in the ward and I told her that am allergic to micropores…only then I got the gyan as to why they give IV during anesthesia to… she didn’t know that it was a 15 minute pin removal stuff and she was planning for a spinal one…
At night I had kept the windows open and the other bed had become damp…I was still asleep when dad had come… and after that I had to go to the sisters to get a fresh sheet for dad to sleep till 7… i didn’t want to eat anything…even though I was permitted liquid till 6 am… around 8…I had to shift my room since there was an accident case who was going to come to the room where I was… I took hair bath…and was solving sudoku in Indian Express when IJ came… he said, he didn’t know that I had checked in…I told him…for uhc, I needed to be admitted before any treatment could commence… he had got 2 spanners with him… he said…”sister, hold the frame, I will remove the struts”… I was shocked…is he going to remove the pins, right here on the ward bed without anesthesia…okie I thought, IJ knows the best… the top frame had been loosened for quite some time and the pin usually hurt with every movement… and I tolerated the pain till he removed 4 struts… after that the frame started tilting and even I had to hold it in place along with the sister so that ij could remove the remaining two…I was literally begging him to remove them in the theatre…but he said, itha mattum vittuta…asingma irrukkum and he removed the last two and I gasped with pain and almost caught his hands… he commanded, now walk and show me… I was scared about my still disjoined fibula and a lumpish newly united tibia…nevertheless…I wore my black pants and walked out of the room where he was standing facing the sisters…
Dad had gone out probably for a smoke during this time…and ij and I spoke for quite some time… he said how he had been afraid, if the bones were really strong enough…and now he was confident on seeing me walk… he said, this is a minor surgery and usually he would never be involved for such cases, his juniors were surprised, that he was getting involved in this… he had told them that I was his special patient and that the PG who would be removing was a good doc… he said…he had to go to Martha or some place like that as examiner…he said, how those stupid ppl had postponed the exam dates and how he had to cancel his tickets… and since it was sabari malai season…there was no hopes in train… since it was AC…he could not have WL tickets…he said, the rly station was very near the college and by flight he had to travel backwards to Chennai wait there for 2 hours and down south, literally clock in same hours… they would just cancel the flights… at least for delhi, there would be some mla to flight…now he was a ticketless man he said…
He said, how even if it was free patient, he would patiently explain and draw diagrams and explain the treatment being given… and he described how, for his daughter’s delivery, his son-in-law had huge sum from insurance… even then, the cost came to 22k it seems… he said, how he had brought up his 3 kids modestly even though he had the riches…but you guys need to be careful with your generation he said… he said about his nephew working in Pune for Siemens who was the director whose company insisted he ride a bmw leaving his corolla…he earned close to a crore a year, but used to tell ij…”uncle, I cannot continue like this for long”…. And such similar talks…I was just gazing at him like a light dazzled doe, thoroughly soaked in his voice…we were standing kind of close to each other and I could feel his warm breath…
Suddenly dad appeared out the blue… and joined in… and I felt the moment was gone… dad joined in with more trivia… meanwhile ij asked, whether, I could read tamil… I said… definitely… that is my mother tongue and I know how to read… and he said, he will try to give me a small booklet, it was on the miracles of life etc… I felt bad, that I had not got him anything, thanks to my Libran ways of spending…
He was talking about how gals come to their parents home only rarely…his daughter had come recently for delivery… he said even if children want to come to their parents home …they would not have time… my daughter has married a guy of her choice… and I am happy with that …even if I had to find a guy like that I would not have been able to… he keeps her happy… my dad agreed that kids never had time for their parents and it was loneliness left to parents in the end…
After such similar talks I asked, was it a boy or gal… his daughter’s kid…baby… I blabbered… IJ said, it was her second delivery and it was a gal, the first was a boy… well few more talks…he said he had to leave now and we then shook hands and he went away… that was the first time I walked to the theatre bed instead of being lifted in a stretcher… the first time and hopefully last time…I made them put a cloth bandage instead of a micropore that would give me blisters on my hand when I wake up…after the minor frame removal and anesthetic sleep back in the ward…I found his booklet with his handwritten message… I forgot about everything else and started to read it… and sent a stupid msg stating I agreed with some % of what was written in it… that piece of paper with his handwriting is now my most treasured thing… So many times, like a fool, I would gaze that paper, instead of preparing for my entrance exams…
Many a times, I would just hold that square bit of paper and cry foolishly for no reason what so ever… at the end…it would be funny to realize that there was no rational reason behind those tears…
Yes’day afternoon on Monday after getting my two reference letters from 2 moonies in Chennai, I boarded Lalbagh express and around 5:30… passed through Katpadi station… I was confused over calling or messaging IJ. I was in roaming and 2 days in Chennai had taken its toll on my pre paid airtel connection. And, I thought, what if, the call got cut while in call, as it usually happens during train journey. I was also concerned, that my msg might end up a failure delivery as it had happened with those numerous messages I had sent him, everytime, I came to Chennai or passed via vellore. So finally I decided, I will message him, for my throat was also hurting for the past few days, thanks to late night methi parantha and amul curd or god knows what. Since both my roomie and I, got sore throat at the same time, it should have been something, we ate together. Too bad, that my star is a naidhana for her, though hers is a kshema star for me…
So I messaged him, a simple just wanted to say hi… passing through katpadi message… immediately, quite unexpectedly…I got the reply… to anyone else…it would have been just a thanks for your thoughtfulness…best wishes msg… but coming from an Aquarian…that too his first ever reply to my sms…I was enthralled… burst into silly smiles and seconds later… could not help crying… do not know why… there was a family in front of me… with a small pamperedWithLaysAndOtherEquallyWonderfulJunkFood boy of about 7 and well adjusted couple and 2 oriya guys next to me… so I had to resort to bending down on my heavy bag and finished crying till my throat and self felt better…
Man… along with that squarish bit of paper…this msg will be something I treasure till my whim lets me to… He made my whole day… the only thing, I could remember then was Khalid Gibran's quotes… what makes you most happy, makes you cry the most as well… how long will I obsessed with ij god?
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