well... this time, it the was the only 5 days i was going to get after so many months. And i was not sure, when i would get another break like this. My initial plan for these 5 days was to go to Kanakapura ashram. But mom had called up once to tell how lonely she was and i had booked the tickets right then cancelling all other plans.
The train was at 7:05 and R and I boarded the auto around 5:30 p.m. We shared stories and he got me into this Mookambigai trip now. Am jes craving for this trip now. Thats what my astro mentor S also recommended. Mom said, we have been there twice and once my sis was apparently swept 1 km downstream in the river around this temple. But i don't remember anything about this temple.
I was reading "Surely you are joking Mr Feynman" in the train and R's tap on my right knee woke me up around 3:50 am where we parted ways. I got down to the LB and slept there till I reached junction. I called up mom and asked her, when the next bus would come. I would have waited for some 30 mins, when a guy came and asked me if i was my sister. Since he said my name i said yes and slowly recognized that it was KP's father. He had retired and settled in kerala and KP had got another son Razin, the first one was Mauzin. He said he had a granddaughter through his son, but had never seen her. KP was always a fabulous gal. Aug 28 and she was the one who had me always laughing, whenever she came home. She was gr8 fun to be around with. Now her hus works in Gulf and i don't know how she manages.
He dropped me at home and i was shocked to find the door locked. I tried mom's number and found that it was ringing inside. I had no other option but to go to the busstand and bring mom back home. House was a mess. I was too tired to clean it up. She left to office and i continued to sleep the whole day. In the night, she got summons from Chennai. Chithi had stopped eating for a week and chithups was summoning mom to chennai. Mom asked, if i could join her. I wanted rest and sent her away. Mom left on tuesday night. 4 nights i was all alone. I slept with the lights on. I kept awake the whole night and slept when i was exhausted in the morning. I was rooted to the bed. I lay there reading books and listening to songs and watching stupid movies that mom had got from down floor neighbours. Airtel signal was weak in oft. I was too lazy to get up and answer phones in the hall. I just lay wedded to bed for 4 days till mom came along with chithi on saturday. I had to leave for blore on sat night. All those days, around 4 pm i would feel hungry and i would hv my first meal then. Luckily on friday, i got sick of this and cleaned the whole house, removed the cobwebs and later i found it was pradosham. But i had had my food and i had forgot to fast. I took a long bath and i tied a green sari and suddenly i realized that my left earring was no longer there. However, with in few seconds, i found both the earring and the thiruhani. Even now this piece is always lose. It was peaceful to be there. The temple had changed so much. All tiles around. As I did a pradakshina around shakthi, tears started pouring again, for no reason at all. Wish... wish... well... everything is destined.
Sat morning, mom left again to office and i was left craving for care. Chithi and i went for shopping grocery. I had survived on wheat dosa and kadamba rice all these days. I offered chithi milk and bread. She took 30 mins to gobble 2 slices of bread. Man i lost my patience. Then i made her mosambi juice out of 3 mosambis which i had squeeze with my hands. I was steadily losing my patience. Only then, i remembered, i need to serve her with love so that she gets cured soon. God these @#@$# doctors. Misdiagnosed malaria to TB and ended up injecting her for what not, that she could not lie on her back. Luckily after a while, i got into the cooking mood. I made manathakalli keerai kootu and kothavaranga usili, murungakka sambar, rasam, sauted mango pickles, moong dal payasam (which is my mom's favorite) and the curd had set like solid cakes. I washed all the serving dishes till it shone and i had arranged an appetising lunch and waited by the window for mom to come home. She came after 40 mins or so and we all sat down to eat on the fresh and tender vazha ezhai. Nothing like eating on those green leaves. Chithi was still in her sambar course, when i was at my curd.
We three collapsed in the hall watching TV. We ended up watching Julie, Ejamaan and one more movie swapping over breaks. Julie dominated though. Suddenly swami came out of no where. I was so surprised. I was supposed to have met dad, met aunty and swami but had ended up spending all time on bed and here he was. I was glad that payasam was there. I made him horlicks, offered payasam, potato chips and good day biscuits. I knew it was a bad combination to offer salty items with milk, but decided, he is supreme, he should be able to digest it. I was glad he was here. He kept on talking saying how i was instrumental in getting him to thiruvanamalai that too for chithra pournami. He asked me to ask him something. I wished, mom and chithi and his wife were not there. I just wanted to pour out to him. But i could not, and ended up with just tears. At last he said, i know and i will take care. I was glad he had come. I was craving for my guru to come and he had come and i realized he is my Sri Sri or Baba Ramdev or Ramana Maharishi. He left around 5:30 pm and my bus was at 6:30 pm. A lonely trip. i felt bad, that i had not spoken to dad even once. I reached majestic and got a one day pass. I reached campus around 7 am. Around 4 pm i decided that i will go to Nimishamba satsang. But ended up boarding a shivaji nagar bus. i ended up window shopping and buying 2 butterfly clips that i had wanted for months. I would have waited for eternity, till i decided to swap buses. I took some bus to jayanagar and from there another bus to campus. I was sad, that i could not have darshan. This was the 2nd time, such a thing had happened. The previous sunday after end terms, i started out and i found the iyappa temple was would open only around 5:30 pm and i could not find a place to sit and wait outside. I ended up walking all outside the campus and reached room exhausted again without darshan.
However, this time, on the last day of navarathri. It was all instantaneous. I had no plans of boarding the bus. However a bus stopped just next to me and i asked the driver and he driver dropped me at Meenakshi temple. It was peaceful inside and i got a decent darshan. Somehow, i feel now, especially after the DD incident, if its time, it will happen. Else it is no use, how much ever u fight against and swim upstream. For that JMET thing, i remember forgetting the DD at home, spending 400+ on auto, coming late to office, filling up app in a hurry. Everything was delayed. Call it hindsight bias. Every thing is interlinked, even if it means someone's murder. It was bound to happen. It will happen, when the time comes. God will make sure, you are the right place at the right time.
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